Prana Danam part 1

3 days into prana danam. The cooking / serving volunteering program I so badly wanted to do, so much that I prayed for it from Devi at her dedicated temple.

The deity heard my demands and made my wish come true. Now my days start at 5.30am and end at 9.30pm, I am exhausted and a low key a little ill.

I had been warned - beware its intense akka you gonna be working hard.

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Indian and tamil names in particular are as diverse as they are elaborate. Prana danam counts just shy of 100 people, and bar a very few I cannot remember any of their names.

But in the practice of the work - the seva, as its called here - I find out it doesn't matter, there are only two names that count and 2 names for everyone: Akka and Anna. Sister and brother, in Tamil. Akka for women and girls, Anna for boys and men - something that is still very counterintuitive to me, as Anna is traditionally a girls name in the western world.

And so, everyone is now either Anna or Akka. Called that way in affectionate, caring or friendly ways just as much as to be told off, given orders or denied something. Called that way to get someone's attention or dozens of times through a conversation. Called that way for anything, anytime.

The convenience for me is eery - I now don't have to remember anyone's birth name, I can just call them by their gendered ashram Tamil name: Akka or Anna.

Beware akka, Prana danam is intense, you won't have time for your self to chill.

Without a flicker of hesitation I noded along and asserted that I'm aware, I'm totally OK with that, I'm so ready for this. In my mind I imagined Foodcycle ×1000, all day everyday for weeks, what better use of my time could there possibly be.

Furthermore, I had grown tired of touristing around - floating from place to place aimlessly as a paying guest but never as a part of anything meaningful. I wanted my India experience to be more, to be productive, gritty, tough, hard earned and authentic. I had always known it would be; long before I even made the decision to leave the UK, I had visualised, fantasised, about foodcycling in the ashram - that ashram my ex boyfriend told me so much about. Now the vision materialised.

Am I happy? I don't know yet. I am tired, and somewhat frustrated with the tasks assigned to me: spot cleaning the floor by hand, scrubbing the sinks, laying out plates. I can do so much more, I know that, but it isn't the point. The aims & objectives of Prana danam is to humble you, to serve others, to run and maintain Akshaya and Biksha hall (the giant kitchen-building and dining hall) in every way needed. The purpose is to forget yourself forget your identifications, your labels and your social roles, and be a piece of life that plays on the same team as all the others who came here to forget themselves. To serve the community in exchange for food and lodging.

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On the program I get to know people - one of the important aims for me in the context of my India trip.

Not just travelers, foreign tourists or domestic weekenders from Mumbai / Delhi frustrated with their cosmopolitan lives. This time, I get to meet a new breed of locals, from various states and social economic backgrounds, who have wholeheartedly thrown their whole selves into spirituality.

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Not every Indian is spiritual, and certainly not to the degree seen here in the ashram, but spirituality plays a major important role in their society and public lives.

Whether it's a small shrine at home, at work, a dashboard deity in your car, offerings shops, restaurants named after deities, one of the very many temples dotting the landscape of every town, a guru giving you life advice, a pooja, a wedding, diwali, dussera, new moon or full moon, there are constant reminders everywhere that religion has to occupy centre stage.

Most people loosely follow some sort of practice, even if just out of superstition or tradition. Naturally, some people dive head first into it all, and make it the centre of their entire lives.

Amongst those are the yoga practitioners, and particularly the sort of people who come to Isha Yoga centre.

Yoga as it is practiced here mustn't be confused with the yoga we have in the west. It isn't a glorified gym class, sparsely dotted with disingenuous wellness affirmations.

It's an entire way of life, a holistic system heavily centered around shiva spirituality, that comprises of strictly classical hatha yoga, meditation, mantra chanting, a proscriptive satvic diet and an austerious lifestyle, all carefully regimented by rigid daily routines.

Being a yogi here requires commitment and dedication, discipline and obedience - the sort of temperament appropriate for Prana Danam. So, of course, that is the sort of people I've come to meet most on the program.